Monday, December 14, 2015

Love Yourself First

Dear Girls, 

It's sad to see a woman with a big heart & so much potential wasting her Time, Losing her Dignity, Values and Self Respect for a sorry ass excuse of a man.  

A man that has nothing to offer but pain, lies, stress and tears. A man that is blinded by his greed to find more jewels for his Collection rather than acknowledging the treasure he has in front of him. A man that will use her to his advantage and ultimately bring down her self-esteem and make her believe that there is no one else better than him out there. Never for a second believe that there isn't someone else better out there, There is. 

"Man" is probably too big and too good of a word to describe someone like that. Don't put up with it out of fear of being alone...Love yourself First.

Love Always!
Seema Sammy. 

Friday, December 4, 2015

Message To Your Ex

Dear Girls, 

Message to My Ex. 


Please don't talk to me now. I have my life together now. I've fallen in love again, and this time, it's with myself. Your name never crosses my mind. Your memory no longer has a home in my heart. I'm finally happy after all these months of you wasting my time and wasting my heart. I am breaking free from you. I am done with you. So please, when you're lonely at 9 PM because all your friends are hooking up, don't look for me. So when you see me dancing at a party and having the time of my life, don't look at me as the 'one who got away' . Look at me as the 'one whom you let go'. Look at the girl who has pieced herself back together after you shattered her.

Have a great day my loves.

Love Always,
Seema Sammy.

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Strange Reflections In A Mirror

Dear Girls, 

 Sometimes the insecure parts of my brain try to sneak in and take over like when I look in a mirror and see a full, extended belly or stretch marks or cellulite or thighs that seem bigger, a small part of me is sad and tries to obsess over it but the REAL me doesn’t give a shit about things like the strange reflections in a mirror.

So I laugh and make a big, satisfying dinner because I know I treat my body amazingly and however it wants to look at this stage in my life is fine by me as long as I am medically healthy and able to live freely.


Love Always,
Seema Sammy. 

Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Learning to Accept Love

Dear Girls, 

Before I start writing my blog, I'll like to apologize to the people that read my blog for not being consistent . Please bare with me as I figure out a schedule that works best.
Sometimes our emotions can get the best of us, they can drag us so far down to where we forget just what it is that once made us happy. Small steps they say, small steps to a happier road, well what if the road on which we walk is far too bumpy? No one can tell you that the feelings you have are wrong. For years I’ve struggled with people that don’t understand my pain, my hurt, my frustration, but I don’t blame them. Not everyone will feel as deeply about the things that you do, I try my very best to tell myself this, but to no avail I seem to foolishly fall back into my habits. These habits are habitually pushing people away, being angry, and sometimes overcome with an overwhelming sense of melancholy.
Is it normal to be chronically sad? To always feel like you’re going to burst at the seems and just fucking explode because you’ve constantly held back emotions that were far too strong just to shove away. Welcome to my mind, where I’m convinced that I feel nothing at all, where I can pretend that all I care about is myself, but then my heart has to remind me that I’m too sympathetic and emotional to be this bad ass that I sometimes portray myself to be. I feel too much, that’s my problem. 
There’s a place in my mind where sad memories dwell, they stay locked away, but ever so often they come out to play and plague my never resting thoughts. What is it like to be calm and collected ? To never feel rejected, to smile and actually mean it ? To be loved and actually feel it ? I’m learning to accept love, it’s not an easy task when you feel so undeserving of affection……


Love Always, 
Seema Sammy.

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

This Past Year

Dear Girls, 

Well, here I am...writing on my blog again.....what a weird feeling. Sorry I've been incognito for a while. I'm going to try to update this more often and try to be consistent.

In the past year:

- I've learned what's it's like to be on your own ; taking care of bills, putting food on the table, being away from your family, being responsible and most importantly being independent.

-I've learned that in some ways I compromise way more than I ever thought I would. Some of these compromises aren't a big deal. And others I know I need to start standing up for what's right more often.


-I've learned that satisfaction comes from working hard and paving your own way.

-But I've also learned that money isn't everything.

-I've learned that I have a long way to go, but I'm a very lucky girl, with all the people who love me no matter what and would do anything to help me. My parents, good friends, and especially God. I would be lost without Him.

- I've learned that being alone with your own thoughts isn't so bad. You don't need to always be surrounded by people.

-Ive learned that people will be nice to you when it's convenient for them and for as long as they are benefiting from being around you.

- I've learned to take risks, maybe something beautiful will come of it or I might have the worst heartbreak ever. So exciting, either way I'll learn.

- I've learned to DO ME and not have second thoughts. People will talk regardless.

Anyway, here's a lovely disjointed post for you. I'll work on this organization thing later.


Have a wonderful day my loves.

Love Always,
Seema Sammy. 




Saturday, October 17, 2015

Stop Being Bullies

Dear Girls, 


It deeply concerns me that people think that fat people hating themselves and calling themselves stupid and ugly is better than embracing who they are and being happy.

Someone’s dress size has no bearing on whether or not they deserve happiness. Being a shitty person who bullies others into thinking they’re worthless because of their bodies has a bearing on whether or not you deserve happiness.
With that being said, try being a good human being! You'll like it. Thanks.

Have a great day my loves!

Love Always,
Seema Sammy. 

Thursday, October 15, 2015

You Are The Woman Of Your Own Dreams

 Dear Girls, 


I hope this powerful quote from Robin Lee penetrate your soul the same way it did mine.
 
 
"Repeat after me: I am the woman of my own dreams. I require no validation. My wish is my command. My life is my own. I build it. My voice is my own. I use it. I am relentless in my dedication to trusting myself. I am insatiable in my thirst for the extraordinary, and I do not settle for the mediocre.
I
Live
Without
Dead
Time."
—  Robin Lee
 
 
Have a wonderful Day my loves. 
 
Love Always, 
Seema Sammy. 
 

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Be-YOU-Tiful

Dear Girls, 

I used to be so insecure about my body. I used hate the fact that I was bigger than all of my friends. I hated my stomach, my thighs, my arms, my stretch marks, etc...
But I’ve gotten so much better now. I smile when I see myself in the mirror and I'm still bigger than my friends. But, that's because I've replaced my insecurities with confidence. 

Of course there’s going to be days where you feel like shit, and don’t want to look at yourself. But there’s also days where you really appreciate yourself, including all your flaws.

Instagram and YouTube has helped me as well, teaching me that it’s okay not to be skinny, and that all body types are beautiful. Besides hating my body is not helping me in no way and I will never get back the present. I want to look back at my life and have happy memories flooding through my mind.

I've noticed that I like myself a lot more. I've stopped comparing myself to other girls as much. I used to be so scared that people would find me disgusting. But now I've learned that I'm more than other people’s opinions of me. if someone’s going to like me, they have to like me for who I am, not who they want me to be. 

Have a wonderful day my loves. 

Love Always, 
Seema Sammy.

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Be gentle to your bodies

Dear Girls, 

At work yesterday, a woman  in her 50’s was showing a lady and I a beautiful photo of herself in a swim suit when she was in her late 20’s. Looking down at the photo she was smiling, but it wasn’t a happy smile, it was sort of sad, maybe a little on the fond side. 

She said "I remember when this photo was taken, I remember thinking how absolutely fat I looked." She continued "God I looked amazing. I didn’t see it then. I only see it now. My daughter freaked when she saw it, ‘Mom you were so hot!’ I was. I was hot. And I didn’t feel it. I didn’t see it.” 


I was having a hard time trying to keep myself together, really. Her expression was so genuine. For a brief moment I couldn’t bare to feel what she must have been feeling right then. Wishing she was kinder to herself. Gentler. I was .. stunned. 


It really stuck with me.  It’ll stick with me forever. It’s frightening what we can’t see in ourselves that others can.

Be gentle to your bodies. 

Love Always, 
Seema Sammy. 

Monday, October 12, 2015

You Are Beautiful


 Dear Girls, 

To be honest, the thing that infuriates me the most on a daily basis is when I see women making nasty comments about other women’s bodies on social media.
It’s bad enough when it comes from men but I can’t handle it when it comes from women. Every woman knows what it’s like to feel uncomfortable in their own skin or feel out of place or to not think very highly of themselves. So why on earth would you want to drag your sister, who’s in the same position you know all too well, down even further? It’s disgusting. Never feel the need to make disrespectful remarks about your sisters.  They are beautiful. You are beautiful.

 Have a blessed day my loves.

Love Always,
Seema Sammy. 

Saturday, October 10, 2015

Stop Being Cruel To Kids


Dear Girls, 

 It’s a shame how hard society is on children and teenagers who are the most fragile and susceptible to developing body image issues and mental disorders. Upon seeing a picture of myself at 16 today, I realized just how average and thin (compared to now) I was.

Now I was never skinny, but I was very, very average. Yet people, adults and peers alike, were good at reminding me that I was not skinny. I was constantly reminded that I was on the larger side, constantly told how “worried” they were about me, constantly being put down and called cruel things by some classmates, and even sometimes by family.

I see pictures of myself from back then and god do I wish that I had the body positivity that I have now. I’m twice the size I was then and I’m happier with myself than I ever dreamed I could be.
And in being happier, I’m making healthier choices in order to better myself, instead of punishing myself. There was never anything wrong with me, but I was told so often that I was unhealthy and unappealing that I was never happy.

Why on earth would people be so cruel to kids? Please reinforce to your (current and/or future) children that they are beautiful. That there is never anything wrong with them or with nourishing their body. Teach them to be kind to others. Teach them healthy habits - mental health included - and do not raise them to believe that they are worth anything less than the entire world.

Have a fantastic Saturday my loves.

Love Always,
Seema Sammy. 

Friday, October 9, 2015

You're Doing a Good Job.

Dear Girls, 

Shout out to all the transgender kids who have unsupportive families towards their identity.

To the ones who came out today.
To the ones who can’t come out.
To the ones who can’t dress how they want because of that.
To all the ones who aren’t financially stable enough for surgery.
To all the male to female kids. You’re fucking beautiful.
To all the female to male kids. You’re so handsome.
To all the genderfluid kids, You’re beautiful and handsome, you go.
To all the ones who constantly get misgendered. It hurts like hell, I know.
You’re still valid.
You are still valid.
Shout out to all the kids that didn't take their life today, and if you need a sign not to.. this is it. I’m here for you.
To the ones whose  families don’t believe that they’re not okay.
To the ones who got out of bed, that’s great.
and shout out to the ones who didn’t, that’s great too.
To the ones who ate today, good job.
And to the ones who are still fighting, look at you. You’re all fantastic. I promise it’s gonna get better.

 Have a fantastic day my loves.

Love Always,
Seema Sammy.

Thursday, October 8, 2015

It's a Journey

Dear Girls, 


I suffered with the ins and outs of eating disorder for a long time. I have my down days, but I'm definitely much more body positive than I use to be. 
I think that loving yourself is one of the most radical things you can do in a world constantly telling you it's wrong to do so. You don't need to be corrected. You don't need to think you're amazing all the time either. It's a journey and that's what is beautiful.
At least, that's what's been beautiful for me. I still get anxious or sad; but I'm always me and I'm pretty happy with that. I'm more than a number on a scale or how little tape I can wrap around my waist. 

Have a wonderful my loves.

Love Always, 
Seema Sammy.

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Self Awareness

Dear Girls, 

                                       To Whom It May Concern

You don't know me and I don't know you. You have no right to judge me and neither do I.
I could do without your stares and giggles or your rude comments about me being a 'Fatass'. 
 
I don't need your validation, opinions and definitely not your close minded remarks. 
I am self aware, in fact I know that I'm fat. I can see when I walk how my legs jiggle or that I have a double-chin. 
 
So I urge you to be so self aware that you don't have to point and stare at me, that you can love your own reflection and not make me the subject of your attention. 

Have a wonderful day my loves. 

Love Always, 
Seema Sammy

Friday, October 2, 2015

You Deserve This

 Dear Girls, 

Every woman deserves a man who is proudly willing to proclaim to the world, "Yeah, she's my one and only. She's beautiful and she's mine." 


If you're going through a breakup and you think he's the one, he's not. He's just a lesson learned. A heartbreak is a blessing from God. It's just his way of letting you realize he saved you from the wrong one.

You will meet someone incredible for your life; just have patience and never settle for less because you deserve the best. 

God knows your heart's desire and if your heart desire is to get married,
He will provide you that mate. However do be mindful, He will provide you your future husband, 
only when the time is right. 

Have a blessed day my loves. 

Love Always, 
Seema Sammy.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

A WOMAN’S WORTH

Dear Girls, 

Please take a few minutes to read this! So worth it! 


A WOMAN’S WORTH

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question: 'What kind of man are you looking for?' She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye & asking, 'Do you really want to know?' Reluctantly, he said, 'Yes. She began to expound, 'As a woman in this day & age, I am in a position to ask a man what you can do for me that I can't do for myself? I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man... or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, 'What can you bring to the table?' The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money.

She quickly corrected his thought & stated, 'I am not referring to money. I need something more. I need a man who is striving for excellence in every aspect of life. He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, & asked her to explain. She said, 'I need someone who is striving for excellence mentally because I need conversation & mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man. I need someone who is striving for excellence spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked...believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster. I need a man who is striving for excellence financially because I don't need a financial burden. I need someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded. I need someone who has integrity in dealing with relationships. Lies and game-playing are not my idea of a strong man. I need a man who is family-oriented. One who can be the leader, priest and provider to the lives entrusted to him by God. I need someone whom I can respect... In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive...he just has to be worthy. And by the way, I am not looking for him...He will find me. He will recognize himself in me. He may not be able to explain the connection, but he will always be drawn to me. God made woman to be a help-mate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself.

When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, 'You are asking a lot. She replied, "I'm worth a lot".

Author- Unknown.


Have a wonderful day my loves! 

Love Always, 
Seema Sammy.

Friday, September 25, 2015

You Always Pass Failure On Your Way To Success.

 

 Dear Girls,

  It's never too late to start over. If you weren't happy with yesterday, try something different today. Don't stay stuck. Do better.

What's your take on FAILURE?
How do you respond to a  bump in the road? 

My dad is wonderful man who has instilled many valuable life lessons in us while we were growing up.

One of his most important life lesson has always been 'if you ever experience a flat, don't slash the other tires'. The rest of the tires will take you far enough to get the flat fixed. 

As I got older I realized that today’s society is obsessed with success and achievement but failure is seen as weakness. 
When it comes to failure, if you avoid making mistakes in your life and avoid all the road blocks in life, then living and experiencing a successful and happy life is going to be impossible to attain.

Embrace your failure whether it is one or many because with the right attitude you're guaranteed a lifetime of success.

One of my favorite quotes on failure is by Mickey Rooney, "You always pass failure on your way to success". 

Have a wonderful Friday! Keep moving forward, never stay stuck!

Love Always,
Seema Sammy.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

Accept Yourself

 

Dear Girls, 

Stop trying to please everyone except yourself.  


AlI that's on my mind is how much I’ve let myself down trying to lift everyone else up. I’ve made this mistake so many times before, but lately it hurts my heart more than usual. I’ve realized just how harmful being too selfless can be.
I love helping others. I lend my ear to sad souls who just want to be heard, or at least they paint a picture as such. I lend my heart to empty people that can never seem to reciprocate my love for them. You’d think after years of constant disappointment I'd learn, I don’t. I learn but I never listen. 
I guess what I’m saying is, stop trying to please everyone except yourself, ACCEPT YOURSELF, learn to value your own heart and let God help you help yourself. It’s okay to be selfish, I have to constantly remind myself…. ITS OK TO BE SELFISH. 
Love always, 
Seema Sammy. 

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

You get in return, what you give.

 

Dear Girls,

     "Be a reflection of what you'd like to see in others."

 I've complained so much about people not giving me what I deserve based on what I'd do for them in a heartbeat. I'm sure you guys have been in this boat too and you're probably settling with what you get.

I've gained so much knowledge with age. Age has given me what I was looking for my entire life - it has given me, ME.  It has provided time and experience and failures and triumphs and time-tested friends who have helped me step into the shape that was waiting for me. You’ll learn, as you get older that you get in return, what you give.

If you want love, give love.
If you want honesty, give honesty.
If you want respect, give respect.


Love Always,
Seema Sammy. 



Tuesday, September 22, 2015

You Are Worthy!

Dear Girls,

You are worthy and amazing right now. You just need to remember who you are, and let go of all the false beliefs you've taken on. Mary Oliver says it better that I ever could...


"You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air
are heading home agaian.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination.
calls you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting-
over and over announcing your place in the family of things."
-Mary Oliver.


Have a wonderful day my loves.

Love Always,
Seema Sammy.

Monday, September 21, 2015

Peace Over Understanding

Dear Girls,

Sometimes we have to choose peace over understanding.

This morning I found myself realizing that sometimes people are just plain nuts. Trying to figure them out, understand or even communicate with them is sometimes...futile.
Rather that engaging and trading energy, there are times when shaking my head, keeping my mouth shut and not engaging is truly the most loving, compassionate thing I can do for everyone.

Sigh.

Peace is the better choice for ourselves and the world. We do not have to try and make sense of everything. There will be days when the smartest decision for all is to shake your head and walk away.

Have a wonderful day my loves.

Love Always,
Seema Sammy.


Saturday, September 19, 2015

 Dear Girls,

Here's a little something to start your day :)

"Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward." - Kurt Vonnegut

This has always been a favorite quote of mine, because it kinda sums up a philosophy I've always had. Sure, there are times you need to cry and just get it all out. I like laughing though, if I can, because I tend to feel better afterwards. The past few days I've been feeling pretty disgusted and frustrated with everything. However, this constant state of frustration and stress was having a snowball effect to where every little thing bothered me. This has been one of those situations where crying isn't helping anymore. So last night I took a big step back from those emotions, chilled out, went to the gym and watched some inspirational YouTube videos . Now I am ready to laugh, because I had gotten pretty tired of all that cleaning up afterwards :).

Love Always,
Seema Sammy.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

 

Dear Girls,

I know from experience that not a lot of us experienced love and encouragement people from the people around us. Most of the time they lash out at us for the way we look. This comes from people who we love and would do anything for. What baffles me is I don't know if they're intentionally hurting me or not. I like to think that they have my best interest at heart and lashing out is their way of helping me. But I've since learned that those people are assholes, yes they could be your parent as a matter of fact. At least for me it was a parent,  most of my teen years were spent with my mother comparing me to every kid in the neighborhood. 'Why can't you look like that girl (girl from my neighborhood)?' she would say. 'Do you see any young girl your age that looks like you' or 'You're too fat, no guy would want you'.  She would say 'don't eat that', 'don't eat this' and would try to embarrass me even when people were around.

My mom thought that embarrassing me would convince me to make drastic lifestyle change and that I'd probably turn into model. No! that didn't happen. What happened though was I'd stress eat because food was my comfort. Food filled that void she caused from hurting and bashing me. She wasn't helping me at all. Instead, she made it worse. I'm not blaming her for becoming over-weight, I did that on my own. I'm just saying she's one of the influences.

Anyways, the point I wanted to get across to you guys is that you should build up the people around you and make them feel loved. Not just loved, encourage them, believe in them and support them. Sometimes people don't see their own worth so please don't be one of the influences to that. They need a little reminder. Tell them about the potential you see in them. Tell them how worthy they are. Let them know you believe in them. Show your support. Most of all let them know you'll always be there for them, that you'll always be a shoulder to lean on. Everyone deserves that positivity and reassurance in their life.

And lastly, I am in no way speaking ill of my mom. I love her, because of her I've become the woman I am today. I thank her because now I can share my experiences and ultimately help someone. I've look at my experiences as stepping stones because I am using them to help young girls or whoever maybe be going through this.

Keep exuding positive energy!

Love always,
Seema Sammy.

Thursday, September 10, 2015

My Opinion Matters!

Growing up people would tell me that I needed to look a certain way, that I needed to lose weight to look beautiful. That I wasn't good enough because I was FAT, yes I used the 'F' word. They would never give me  a chance, they would assume because I'm fat then I can't be ambitious or I wouldn't get anywhere in life. None of my dreams deserve to come true because I am fat. I know this is FUCKING ridiculous but I believed them. I believe that I wouldn't be able to achieve anything.
And for years I've hated myself because no matter how hard I try to look the way society wanted me to look, I couldn't look that way. I started gym, went on crazy diets trying to stave myself, among other stuff. 
The craziest thing was whenever I would see people I haven't seen in a while, first thing they would say is 'you haven't lost any weight?', aren't you doing anything about it?' and then my weight would be the hot topic of that encounter. I mean come on don't you wanna know how I've been doing at school, or if I have a promotion  at work, or I don't know how my fucking day went??? And for years I thought this was the right way for them to treat me because I was FAT. And even if I was doing great in my life, that wouldn't matter because guess what, I was FAT. 

To those people, I say #EffYourBeautyStandards. Eff what you think about me. At the end of the day, you're mad about who I am but I am happy about who I am. And my opinion about myself is the only one that matters darling.
Love,
Seema Sammy. 

Friday, September 4, 2015

Who Am I?

Hello there,  even though I'm not in front of a crowded room of people, I still feel awkward introducing myself. Introducing one's self is so much pressure. I'm suppose to tell you who I am and I don't even know who I am yet. I'm still figuring out myself. What do I say to you? What is appropriate? What is acceptable? Those are the thoughts gushing through my mind. Anyways, here we go.

My name is Seema Sammy born in Suriname, grew up in Guyana and currently living in New York. I just turned 24 and I'm working as a Video Editor. I have a calling for storytelling hence, my job as a video editor. A dream of mine is to be a filmmaker but I don't know how my life will play out so until then I'm a happy dreamer.

I'm a girl by the way if you don't already know and I'm also plus-sized. I've struggle with my weight for my entire life. I recently realized with the help of a few influential public figures and You tubers that being plus sized is not equivalent to unhappiness. I started looking at the positive things about my life and stop dwelling on 'numbers'. I use to think that those 'numbers' define who I am or what I can accomplished. I've recently hopped on the Body positivity train and I would love to share my experiences. 

I'm aware that being plus size is difficult, not because we make it that way but because people around us can't stand that we can be happy and FAT. They feel the need to point it out and then proceed to tell us how to fix it. It is especially harder when you're Indian (Caribbean/ West Indians).  They think that everyone should look a certain way. If you don't look like that then you need to do something to fix it  and they compare you to everyone who fit the perfect description. It was arduous growing up knowing that you're not doing it the right way and that you NEED to lose weight before you can be considered Beautiful. 


One of the main reasons for starting this blog is to empower young girls whether you're from the Caribbean or right here in the US. I know my stories, experiences and struggle will relate to many of you. I want you to know that you're not alone. I strive to be someone that I wish I had to talk too when I was growing up. Someone to encourage me. Someone to let me know that I will be okay. Someone to let me know that my body type wouldn't measure success. Someone to let me know that I can BE myself. I want to be that SOMEONE to you. 


There will be weekly blogs uploaded here, so do not hesitate to message me on any social media platform and I will definitely answer your questions to the best of my abilities. 


Love Always, 
Seema Sammy.